Quote Originally Posted by RedneckNoob View Post
To Umbra, gin0va, Asce, and Woofcat:

Let's say you're sitting in your computer chair and realize that you're thirsty. You see an empty bottle of Gatorade on the floor, a used condom in the trash can, 42 empty tall boys, yarn, toe nail clippers, a razor blade, a Sig P250, an empty computer tower case, a microphone, an empty box of tissues, a full box of tissues, a week old grilled cheese sandwich, and a fresh plate of spaghetti. You have an erection and are wearing nothing but a banana hammock. None of your clothing is clean, and your banana hammock is covered in dried semen. You have been diagnosed with rectal cancer and you will die in two months. What do you do?

tl;dr

I take the p250 and kill myself. It's a better fate than continued exposure to hillbilly literary works of art.